“Recognizing the power of the erotic within our lives can give us the energy to pursue genuine change in our world, rather than merely settling for a shift of characters in the same weary drama. For not only do we touch our most profoundly creative source, but we do that which is female and self-affirming in the face of racist, patriarchal, and anti-erotic society.” –Audre Lorde

Hello and Happy Fall. I’ve taken the spring and summer off from blogging as I healed my heart after the death of a beloved father figure and my pup Lichen. Duluth offers a richness in the warmer months. I drank it in. Now though I feel as if I’m learning how to ride my SiMC blog bike all over again. This year I’m focused on moving the project from personal essay to research and social science. I’m asking more questions about the intersections of whiteness and pleasure and anti-racism.

During Minnesota winter, it’s very important to take high does of immunity boosting supplements. Beside lots of exercise, sleep, pleasure (sex, art, satisfying work, community, playtime in the Wilds, and solitude), I also take mad doses of Vitamin C. Vitamin C(rush) that is.

I love spaciousness. I live four blocks from Lake Superior. This great lake moves me on the daily because of her impossible to develop square area, shifting colors, dramatic shifts in mood in minutes flat, invitations to swim during warmer months. Its surface and shorelines change constantly too yet the hugeness and horizon where water meets sky is a constant. Yes, wide wide water is my thing. Always has been, I believe, always will be.

Flirting on the dance floor, sitting drinking tea together in my office, cuddling on a couch, dancing in and out of different gallery spaces at an art show hoping to see her again and again, fucking for hours in a hotel bed early morning. There is no more light or dark in any of these acts. My mental concepts have just assigned different meaning. I queer these relationships with light and dark.

I love moments of shared awareness used to make something out of the attraction, pleasure and desire I feel about and with another person.

It’s WITCH month and I want to give a shout out to all the womXn in my life. Holy! 2017 covens and feminist explosions everywhere= art+awareness+activist Families, beautiful Co-workers, intoxicating Lovers, dearest Friends, creative Producers I love you so much

After the third, the phrase “I’m fun to have sex with” floated through my head. I noticed it and smiled. This last week has been all about dedication to watching thoughts come up and choosing not to get carried away by them. It was a mild flirting with the idea of death, or moreover, the idea of letting go of all I absolutely Love about life- and there is SO FREAKING MUCH I do love.

A crush is a spark, a match, do I want to feed the fire? Fire, light, life, sex. All of this sits right here between us at the Spring Equinox. I want to feel my fire, light, life, sex in ways known and unknown. That is the best way to describe this moment. Spring equinix if the balance of the known and the unknown. It is really quite delicious.