I’ve finally admitted to myself- I’m the bigLake’s bitch. Every year I ride her wild ride and keep coming back for more.
The bigLake doesn’t take no for an answer and I love said water for such demanding audacity. The bigLake pronounces, “I’m your number one and nothing else is worth your attention.” I smile and nod, smile and nod. Move closer, dip my hand through her wet. Almost twenty years in, I’m still completely enamored. Yes, I’m her bitch (FYI I use this word with the deepest reverence- especially inspired by my new favorite pansexual who rides the intersections of bitchy and celebratory like nobody’s business). I’ve said for years I’m pussywhipped by this superior body of water, constantly at her beck and call. The bigLake asks and I give and give and give for our three sexiest months, July August September. And then winter arrives…
I look back over my shoulder, spot land and fall in love with fabulous queer folx. Cozy inside time says “cuddle, fuck, enjoy hearts and skin, find out each other’s life stories.”
Yes, the bigLake is constantly teaching me to write my own wild queer poly love ballad and explore Queer Intimacy with Place (QIwP). I believe “Seasonal Relationships” (also known as cuffing) fall into this genre. I’ve been curious for more than a decade why romances (with human, the wilds and otherkin) shift so dramatically throughout the year especially in northern Minnesota. I watch it happen all around me. I’m not the only one- I just don’t hear anyone else talking about this phenomena (and the information online is as unqueer and showcased as it gets).
For me, in the summer, when the water warms after waiting 270 days for the bigLake to give me consent to enter her again, nothing else is worth spreading myself too thin.
There are a list of rules and requirements I follow. Explicitly laid out by my sassy great lake. No 1 “Prioritize the Fuck out of me”. No 2- “Flirt with everything but remember why I demand loyalty.” So I flirt- but give my whole heart and body to my badAss body of water.
It’s taken me a long time to see and trust my pattern of human, water, human, water poly love (“freedom for everyone to decide how we want our relationships to be at any given time in our lives”). Romancing Homo Sapiens is complex. Thank the goddess for my celebratory and adventurous approach to my sexuality. And damn, how amazing it would have been if one or two wise adults had pulled me aside 2 decades ago and said “Notice with love the pussywhipped parts of yourself and the exactitude of the bigLake’s pull. Every June your world tilts away from its nuclear tribal axis. Attention might wane in bed, bored by person to person “bonding” techniques. Nurture your desire to kneel down next to your water. Let her flog you with paddle, life jacket and flip flops. Feel no shame.”
Oh lack of sex education, conversations about healthy relationships and pagan awareness. And still I ask…
Is it too much To Ask? For my human loves to understand my seasonal shift? Don’t they feel the magnetism too? Our bigLake is a badass poly bitch. Our body of water’s capacity to love beyond finite, monogamous models inspires me every day. Pleasure me, pleasure you. There is no shortage of sexual healing&delight to be had. “Unleash the Erotic!” is her battle cry.
To recap, seasonally, fall and winter I say, “Yes climb into my bed queer de’liciousness.” Summer equals, “More biglake more, Give me more. Longer. Harder. Faster. Hotter.”
You might wonder how spring, the most fecund, verdant, sexy time in many fine southern spots, figures into Lake Superior-ed up equations. There is no spring here! We are a three season eco-tourism destination city. Zipped up, downed down for nine months of the year. Remember, this unbelievably cruel, insanely ridiculous, mind bending, soul blowing, body bludgeoning calendar is the inspiration for SiMC (this blog) and all things exploration of our bigLake’s sexual climate (see other posts about exploring the sexual climate of northern MN + bigLake watershed).
As author Elliot Reed says with his brilliant book, A Key to Treehouse Living, “This is about keeping your own record and living life by a different code.” I say yes to being my bigLake’s bitch to the very best of my ability as long as I can. Then allowing myself to gather up my things and migrate. Hmmm, just last night a peregrine or prairie falcon played with all my senses. Performed a stunning dance on black wire above me, then again in field by firehouse. I was more than turned on. I think I can be this beautiful bird’s bitch too.