Erin O'daniel is a writer, artist and gender expansive womxn living in Duluth, Minnesota

Queering My Community

Dear Audre, Paulie, Angela, bell, Alice, Adrienne, A.L. Steiner,

Yesterday I went to the Trans Teach-In at the University of Minnesota Duluth. The half day experience was filled with radical ideas and subversive conversations… for Duluth.

Anywhere else this would be the most 101 of educational experiences on such topics. Here though it feels pulsing, controversial, refreshing and incredibly queer.

This morning I’m sitting again with the question I’ve recently been tossing out to the radical faeries in the multiverse. How do I create more space for radical folx and interactions in my Duluth life? I’m craving exposure to high level political ideas and an ability in others to both hold awareness of self and the world through a radical social justice lens.

I’m so used to being the one that queers the space- inserts radical ways of questioning, living, working, loving. In the past, I’ve belittle Duluth and surrounding areas for not… being more. This morning, full on queer feminist concepts and new queer connections, I’m challenging myself to not push away the soft, “big-hearted”, well-intentioned community I have AND create space for more radical players to step closer into my circle.

Queering space where there is always and will always be more space to Queer is an adventure- and exhausting. I think of the people in my circles that like being around me to expand their lexicon of ideas. And I enjoy being around them to soften my ego??

It is symbiotic. I understand the exchange and currently am craving to bring some of these more radical, Queers closer into my intimate circle. So much softness there right now. Obviously appreciated Audre, Angela, Paulie and Adrienne. And I want more.

Thinking of folx who organized yesterday’s event, who rock the academic speech. My sister and bestie Pickle far away but ultimately so accessible. The HOTDISH Militia with its desire to be inclusive and our underlying radical nature, which will always Queer any space it takes up. Fuck yes!

I think of Elizabeth. Who queers spaces with her edge and creative, crazee smartness. I think of my bike tour sisters and my TC connections. I think of the Smitten Kitten and RJLicious. I think of books endless books.

Audre, Adrienne, Angela, Alice, bell, A.L. Steiner, and Paulie I think of you. I think of bringing Emily Nagoski to Duluth for Sex(Po)sitive Duluth. Queer Flavor. What can this be? Using the momentum, recognizing what potential Duluth holds. My job. How can I queer my job? By going to things like yesterday- always.

The queerness I desire will come my way as I continue holding space for it. I know the process. Focus on open-hearted Queerness. Feel bold enough to ask for the things I desire, ordinary like easy and satisfying dog love, trusting in what I lend the word- as a Queer, genderqueer, artist, lover of wildSpace, community building/believing. Here mental concepts- the beauty of thoughts and ideas that challenge the way we have been doing things, are committed to creating space for bodily autonomy for all, are totally into queering the space of romance and art. I love these radical thoughts. LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE Audre, bell, Angela, Adrienne, Paulie, Alice, A.L. Steiner. I want others who shower me with radical ideas like the ones I drank in yesterday. So freaking delicious.

Here Audre, bell, Angela, Alice, Adrienne, Paulie I choose to create, allow, enjoy more of the above. Notice my renewed confidence, stay committed to sweeping away petty thoughts and focusing on these desires. How fucking amaZZZZing queering space and being around folx who queer space, stand committed to queering space feels. Radical queer feminist FAERIES and bad ass mother Fuckers.

And Audre, Adrienne, bell, Angela, Alice, Paulie, A.L. Steiner I know its here, I know y’all are here and I’m intelligent and wise enough to do this work. My soul and brain and heart and Body yearn to do this. Be radical and kind in the Queerest of ways. In the mother fucking most beautiful and smart Queerness I can create. This is following my heart AND Queerness. I follow my Queer fucking badass heart. Winter! now outside and invincible summer inside me= Queerest Me. QUEEREST ME. I hold space to engage the QUEEREST ME in fucking delicious new, brilliant, bold, radical creative ways.

It’s who I am Audre, bell, Adriennce, A.L., Paulie, Alice and Angela.

My bubbles and others’ bubbles. Creating, escaping, enjoying, avoiding.

 

2017’s An Orgasm a Day

My CAPACITY to LOVE